Diary of a PW- Why does it hurt so bad?

To all my PW's out there
There are times when ministry just down right hurts.  People hurt you, people hurt you and people hurt you.  Or they hurt your family, they hurt those your close to, they hurt the church.  A lot of hurt all round.
My first couple years of pioneering were pretty much pain free... Atleast people wise...
Ha...rounding 5 years I have definitely endured my share of punches and cuts to the heart.  And after speaking with some more of my PW friends I realize this is entirely common. 
Not to diminish the pain of non-pw's, but being on both sides I can say that the PW side has hurt just a little more...

And only for one reason and one reason alone...
You can't say anything! 
Yup that is 100% the hardest thing for me.  When I am hurt, snubbed or ticked off I must continue to gleam my pearly whites and live like ' a christian'.
 Aren't we all supposed to act like Christians?  YES....but let's just say if I have an off day, it gets taken much more seriously.
I didn't quite understand this dynamic until I started to experience hurt, pain and ongoing annoyance.   I realized...wow...this is just a bit challenging.  Now everyone has a different PW style and some women will tell you like it is...these women are lucky...
Lucky they have the strength to tell people their mind, though there is most certainly a consequence to that.  For myself I am just not that gal.  If you are close to me, yes I will tell you my mind!  Don't ask me things unless you want to hear the truth...
But I don't just do that for anyone, cause I have learned not everyone is interested in hearing my opinion.  Why ask then?  Lol

Back to hurting...
I heard the saying get bitter or get better.
I am very determined that no matter how much ministry may hurt me at times, I refuse to get bitter.  Refuse to allow the situation to shrink me down spiritual or back off in the ministry.  Refuse to let the hurts people cause me from continuing to pour out my life on others and looking at everyone with a skeptical eye( wise eye though).
So there it is for all the world to read and especially that darn old devil, hurts can come but I am not backing down.
I encourage you PW or not, don't let the hurts of life make you bitter, let them make you better!!


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